Every day we are exposed to the eyes of the world in different ways, whether that is by just walking to our job, school, university or at our favorite late night club, and of course, through social media. It’s inevitable to receive various reactions to the ways we exist, look and act, in exactly the same way we would react to somebody else. It is precisely this exposure of oneself to the world that makes us a target of criticism, which unfortunately is more often equated with insult.

Understanding the difference between these two concepts is crucial in order to nurture healthy communication and relationships. Criticism is created to be constructive and it serves a great purpose. Criticism is pointed out to strive for the better, it exists to give suggestions for improvement and not as a need to attack. But clearly these principles aren’t always the case. Of course, the boundary between giving a constructive opinion and insulting is subjective, and in my opinion the received feedback really depends on how we perceive somebody’s body language, tone, empathy etc. 

There are a few factors that significantly influence this unclear distinction. The first thing that comes to my mind is social media, as “basic” as it sounds. Hundreds of platforms have democratized communication through actualization of terms that imply disparagement and underestimation. Allowing individuals to express freely can lead to harassment and cyberbullying that we witness more and more often. Typing through a screen with anonymous or open identities allows us to comment on everything that triggers our eyes. I am not saying that the medium is only promoting negativity, but we cannot deny that it has increased it. On the other hand we can’t only blame social media and technology for this phenomena. Polarized societal viewpoints, political correctness, “cancel culture”, subjective sensitivity and many more things highly influence this distinction.

I would add that regardless of the intent, both criticism and insults have psychological impact on the individuals and that is exactly why instead of arguing about taste, morals and norms we should try and promote healthier communication that is at the core of empathy. As cliche as it sounds, it really costs nothing to be kind, and if you really think it through, every problem starts with the lack of kindness, while the solution comes with its presence.

Martina Danilovska