THE FLICKER OF HAPPINESS

We often make the mistake of dividing the world into small and big moments. We look at everything that happens and we place it in a box. A box of moments that we view as insignificant and a box of moments, we are taught are going to determine our future. But what about the moments that make us happy? What about that second when time stops and life is happening just in the present? What about now?

Have you ever felt the cold, yet refreshing drops of rain on a warm, humid summer day? How about the first winter snow? Have you ever stayed up all night watching your favorite movie or reading your favorite book, have you experienced the silence of a sleepless night, the sky painted in ethereal colors at the exact moment the sun rises or the reflection of a sunset in the deep blue water of the sea.

How about hearing the song you absolutely adored three years ago but suddenly forgot about it, reading a quote from the book you read so long ago and loved with every inch of your body, the flood of memories triggered by a smell, taste or a place. The sound of waves meeting the sand, the sound of a familiar voice. Do you recall the moment your loved ones told you they loved you, receiving amessage from someone you care deeply about?A four-hour phone call whereyou are silent together, a birthday call at midnight or a spontaneous walk in the neighborhood. The gratitude spreading through every vein when you realize you were blessed with beautiful people in your surrounding.

How does looking at your favorite painting make you feel, all the colors known to men blending and creating a masterpiece? A random but heartwarming greeting from a total stranger. Tears of sadness mixing with those of joy as you cry yourself to sleep. Visiting the place you always dreamed of. Seeing a picture that perfectly sums up that period of your life or the relationship with a certain person. Family walks. Finding the “memory” box you made where you keep every little thing your friends gave you or a piece of your adventure with them. Those sleepovers, nights spent talking for hours about anything and everything in total darkness except for the moonlight coming from the window, parties filled with music, laughter and carelessness.

The message you get wishing you a good night, a hug from your dearest friend, the one glance you exchange, reassuring each other that you are here through thick and thin. The alone time with your thoughts. The cheers between drinks and the comfort food at three in the morning. A split second where the adrenaline or fear turns to happiness and relief. Let’s not forget about those memories which decide to pop up in the most random of times but never fail to put a big smile on your face. A kiss that tells a whole story and a touch that holds an unexplainable amount of love. Lastly, the exact moment you realize you are alive.

To each their own, but we can all agree that these are the moments worth fighting and living for. Life is so much more than a routine, nine to five job and rules placed upon us. It would be an incomprehensible tragedy for one soul to never encounter the true joys life offers. It’s the little things, it will always be the little things that will sprinkle bliss in the darkest of situations. And when you are finally ninety and sitting in your rocking chair next to the fireplace, you will think of each and every one of these moments and a flicker of happiness will appear just as strong and warm as the flames in the burning fire.

                                                                                                Ana-Marija Pejchinovska

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